or not

But whatever. Michigan still sucks.

Holy Shit

What a game. NCAA RULES! Unbelievable! Sparks ices over and then brings it back. Michigan sucks. Long live the SOUTH!!!!

N'Y Pensez Pas Trop

Spring is finally here. Well, in name anyway. For me, this means an increase in Bosanova, and of course my ubiquitous Spring album: the La Belle Histoire soundtrack will be broken out. Spring also brings with it the opening of Tom Collins season; we'll have the opener at the Boat House this year. And of course, the Spring party season arrives courtesy of Brown & Brown Productions. We'll kick off this year at 10G, probably on April 16th. Spring is always my best time of year, and even though a bunch of people tried to fuck it up last year, it was still awesome.

In other news, last night we watched Shaun of the Dead which was pretty much best ever. I won 10 bucks from Nav, it was triumphant.

Noah (aka PTF) comes to visit this weekend. Unfortch, unlike everyone else in the free world, I actually have to work on Friday which blows, but I'll catch up with the gang for cocktails and shenanigans in the post work hours. It that his younger brother, who will be in tow, is finally of the drinking age---this is going to be a good one.

But I'll Just Keep on Rollin' Along With the Grace of the Lord Above.

When you find what completes you, it's a magical moment. It's like coming home, going on a fantastic journey, being lifted into the heavens and descending to Earth all at the same time. This is the way I've always felt about Led Zeppelin. From scrawling the lyrics to "Misty Mountain Hop" all over my book covers in 3rd grade to building a Physical Graffiti sand castle with the J-Mizz, Zeppelin has shared some of the best and not so best times with me. I haven't listened to them in a while- I've been preoccupied with other, less gritty ditties-but just now, listening to Mr. Plant's warble on, "Since I've Been Loving You" I'm reminded of the true power of music.

In light of this, I will be playing only Zeppelin tonight while we're out. I'm definitely playing "Heartbreaker" into "Livin' Lovin' Maid" which is the best duo EVER. Even better than the rare-ish DEAD couple "Scarlet" "Fire."

Yeah, ain't but one thing to do Spend my natural life with you,
You're the finest [band] I knew, so fine.

Whiskey for the Leprechauns! Whiskey for the Leprechauns!

I always greet St. Patrick's Day with equal parts giddy anticipation and unequivocal fear. It's a holiday that starts out with the best intentions (having a "roast turkey dinner" aka Guinness) but usually ends up with someone going to the hospital or climbing through my window. Each year, I shudder with the knowledge that some crazy freaked-out thing is going to happen to me and I have absolutely no control over it. Some say the loonies come out on Halloween, in my world, however, they wait for a holiday that revolves around getting good and liquored up. Game on.

The other thing that has remained constant throughout the years is my "Luck of the Irish" speech. It was first delivered so brilliantly by John Belushi on SNL and I have tried to carry on the tradition. In elementary and high school, I simply recited the speech for anyone who would listen, and most people didn't get it. But, by the time I got to college, it quickly became a thing of legend--requiring me to stand on the roof top of a house or two in order to re-enact the scene for a larger audience. In recent years, I've taken the show on the road. St. Patrick's Day 2002 was spent driving by myself from Tennessee to Alabama. I decided to stop in Chattanooga for the grandest setting the speech has ever seen. ROCK CITY. Here, amongst the fake stalagtites and super creepy talking gnomes, I gave the speech to SEVEN STATES at once. It was a triumphant day and one that I won't soon forget.

This year, I'll be spending St. Patrick's Day with a few close friends. Clearly the speech will be given, maybe not from a roof top, and maybe not from a mountain top--but from the top of my lungs and the bottom of my heart.

So Hott, So Best/So Not for All the Rest

Joan Jett is playing a Super Special Concert at Webster Hall on April 7th. You get "FREE" tickets when you buy her new album at Best Buy...that costs 17.99.

The Cocteau Twins have pulled out of Coachella. I'm not going this year in favor of JAZZ FEST and visiting Pands and Spence on the back end. This is the only band I was sad about missing since I'm seeing most of the others as they come through the NYC. It sucks for all those who awnted to bake in the sun while listening to Blubeard. Durst.
All of the above from Jasonproductshop.

Have I Mentioned that My Life is Over?

So once again I've sabotaged my own happiness. I find the ease with which I can accomplish this task, amazing. I wish I could get a job doing it. I am, however, adding it to my skill set on my resume right after "proficient in French."
Some good things do happen each time I shoot myself in the foot. I often drop the novels or non-fiction works that I'm reading and retreat into short stories, and short or short-short non-fiction narratives. This in turn motivates me to write (for real, not the crap I throw up on the internerd). Writing is perhaps my favorite thing to do besides singing and dancing, but mostly I reserve the latter two for times when I'm not feeling the triumph of my own stupidity (unless of course, you count the relentless, sorrow filled "Sometimes I Feel Like a Motherless Child" that continues to spin in my head)
Ok anyway, other tricks that I use to steer myself out of the pits of despair include prisms. Prisims are a lot of fun. They're not only really really pretty, you can work out cool mathematical functions trying to figure them out.

Kaleidoscopes (I realize that this is the Rose Window, but it looks like a kaleidoscope and all the kaleidoscope sites are shit). I was obsessd with these devices as a child. The changing patterns and swirling colors as so existential/zen or whatevs.

Um, yeah...

Anyway, did you know that Boy George was responsible for Richard Bronson buying/creating Virgin Airways? It's true. Bronson made so much cash off of Culture Club that decided to by an airline. Sweet.

One More in the Name of Love

Well, acutally TWO more in the name of love. U2 announced through Bilboard that they'll be playing two more NYC dates (November 21-22) at MSG. Tickets go onsale Monday the 21st...get that refresh button ready.

The Ides are Upon Us

The week surrounding the Ides of March has traditionally had an above average strangeness factor for me. All kinds of crazy shit has happened to me during this week in the past and as much as I try to execute preventitive measures in an effort to avoid said crazy shit, this week never fails to kick my ass. So this year, instead of hiding away (I actually tried to lock myself in my dorm room in 1998 but the crazies just entered through the window---foreals) I'm facing this years Ides with open arms. ...and speaking of crazies, ladies and gentlemen, Brittney Spears:

Here's her advice for Michael Jackson:

"If he did those things, I feel sorry for him. I feel like he probably feels alone, and he needs some help.

"He needs someone to be like, 'OK, let's buck you up, let's give you a moustache, let's rough you up, let's go to a bar, let's get drunk and be a man.'

"And if he didn't do those things, I feel sorry for him. Either way, he needs to get in a fight."

Water Will Change to Cherry Wine

This weekend had a lot of potential. Some of it was lived up to, some of it makes me want to go on a bender.

Friday was spent in the land of severe hangovers. This was due in large part to THE ONE AND ONLY PANDA making a guest appearance the city fka Panda's Playground. It was so good to see her. This town just hasn't been the same since she left, not to mention my extreme sadness in her departure. So we did what we do best, get trashed and make HUGE plans (and by plans, I mean asses of ourselves). Highlights of Thursday night include us setting the carpet at the Royalton on fire and having a cry about what, I can't remember.

Friday evening was all about EJ's performance at the UCB Theatre. So Much Best. They were awesome. Like a MILLION times more awesome than my class last summer. SPACE PIRATES. Whatevs.

Friday might, Spencer got into town and we all chilled out for a while. Pands and Spence went out but I opted to stay home since I was five paces from death. The J-Razz, fresh from the strip-club, and I DJ'd Steely Dan and had some wine. It was relaxing and I was so glad I didn't have to spend five hours at a bar drinking shitty drinks while wishing I was home listing to Countdown to ecstasy.

Spence and I took a walk the next morning and then I went to meet up with Nick and Guy so we could walk around and eat Apple Fritters and buy obnoxiously priced polo shirts at Marc Jacobs.

Then it was off to Bensonhurst for Bailey's birthday. Holy Shit. I've never been so far away in my life. I didn't know that it could take an hour and a half to get somewhere and still be in New York. But it was way worth it cause we had the BEST TIME EVER. I ate bunnies and we could smoke in the restaurant which was clutch.

After I got back to the city, I met up with Andrew, who is the most fabulous person ever (mostly cause he's British, but he's pretty cool just as a person too). I tried desperately and unsuccessfully to hang on to sobriety. Then Van came and it was downhill from there. I spent a large part of the remainder of the evening with my head in my hands saying things like "oh dear god, no" and "oh my god I can't believe you just said that..." It was fablacular to say the least. But c'est la vie. Then we went home and had screwdrivers at 8 in the morning.

On Sunday, I got up and went for a walk and then met Bails for brunch. She suggested I rent Here On Earth. It was THE WORST MOVIE EVER. I recommend renting it simply so you experience the worst movie ever. EVER.

Then I met up with Nick, Guy and Carl at Landmark Sunshine to see The See Inside. It was awesome, and not just because I'm obsessed with quadrapaligics and used to pretend I was a parapalegic in college. I highly reccomend going to this movie immediatado. Then we had dinner at Elephant. I had Duck. It was good. My life is officially boring. And....freeze.

Oh, but I did get James Brown tickets and that's pretty sweet.

Park That Car, Drop That Phone

Concert Update
I'm going to try and get to as many of these as possible. Tickets on sale NOW.

March
10-22 Allman Bros Beacon Theatre
21 Backstreet Boys Irving PLaza
23-30 Black Crowes Hammerstein
28 The Walkmen Irving Plaza

April

3 LCD Sound System
Bloc Party
4 Dogs Die In Hot Cars and Phoenix Irving Plaza
4 Lou Reed Crobar
5 Psychedelic Furs Supper Club
9 And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead Irving Plaza
10 And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead Irving Plaza
13 Duran Duran MSG
14 Widespread Panic Radio City
14-22 Earsure Irving Plaza
21-24 Lenny Kravitz Beacon
25 Bob Dylan Beacon
22 Elvis Costello Beacon Theatre
23-30 JAZZ FEST N'Orleans, LA
28 New York Dolls Irving Plaza

May
The Decemberists Irving Plaza

Blinged Out Brooklyn Stizz

Posh outfitted her son, Brooklyn with earings that match her footballing husband, Becks', famous $150,000 ghetto studs. So basically she spent $50,000 on something that's going to make her child look like a total douchebag. I can just see this kid in 6 months..."Mummy, I've lost my bling -bling in the Marmite. Can we get Jacob to whip up another?" So ridiculous. Unless you're King Louis the IVX or Prince, a guy (much less a CHILD) decked out in jewels is all kinds of wrong.
Note: The above picture is not Jacob the Jeweler, it's Jesus.

And Everybody Knows It

The What's Up returns after a few months on hiatus. Why? Mostly cause I've had a real lot of coffee and I'm waiting to get some documents in before I can "work." Another reason for the sudden resurgence is: Spring is coming. That means tons of shows, lots of drinking and of course those priceless encounters with the oposite sex. Sure, there are some great ones from over the winter, like the time I made out with Jimmy Falon afterwhich he stalked me for a week. And the guy who, after knowing me for five minutes, proceded to tell me he was in love with me and had dreams about me and pretty much showed up at my house naked. But let's face it, all those Saturdays spent swilling champers at ten o'clock in the morning DJ-ing "mission control" style do not an exciting blog make. I'm espcially looking forward to April when The Army of Fun takes on JAZZ FEST. Will I be able to stay with the group and not wake up on the "wrong side of town" in the gutter a la Mardi Gras 2000? Stay tuned.

This is The What's Up. Betta Ask Somebody About It. What.