Beautiful 1BR Flex 8

This morning as I sat in front of this box of parts some may refer to as a computer, and tried desperately not to look on craigslist. It's like a crack addiction. I have to look, and then I have to call up the Times and look there afterwhich I check out the "New and Noteworthy" at Ardorny. Hoping and praying that the perfect three bedroom has just been posted. Then I start making phone calls. The appartments they post are always taken but the kind brokers always have other places to show me, most of which do not meet our criteria, but we never find that out till we're actaully in the appartment because the brokers really don't like to give you much information about a place in an effort to trap you into a deal. Hoodwinkers, the lot of them.
Here's the latest crazy story invovling me and a broker. I goes something like this: Jen (broker) pickes me up in her Mitsubishi convertable. She drives like a maniac. She rear-ends a car on Broome St. but noting not damage, she waves at the driver and speeds off. She takes me to see crap appartments. I think she's high the whole time. She leaves me in the car while she gets some keys to an appartment she wants to show me as well as some "money some people owe me." We're parked illegally on Houston. I don't drive standard. TWO sets of police come by. I sweat profusly. Luckily, they dont' say anything to me and I'm left to wait anxiously for this crazy girl who wants to set me up with one of her friends cause she can tell I like "bad boys." She gets back in the car. She rolls a joint, smokes it and proceded to stuff her face full of chewy Japanese candies. She borrows five dollars in quarters from me. She begins to cry beacuse the "people who owe her money" didn't give it to her and now she can't make her car payment and her mom is sick and she has to suppoert her. I ask her to drop me off at the next corner.
I lasted till just about the bitter end with this person why? Because even though I knew right away she was a total nutcase, I thought, "What if she has a great listing, I don't want to miss out." That's how bad it is. By the way, the picture above? Not the place I'll be living in.